“We were crushed and overwhelmed beyond our ability to endure, and we thought we would never live through it. In fact, we expected to die. But as a result, we stopped relying on ourselves and learned to rely only on God, who raises the dead. And he did rescue us from mortal danger, and he will continue to rescue us. We have placed our confidence in him, and he will continue to rescue us.” 2 Cor. 1:8–10 NLT
To the Parent of a Special Needs Child..
Special needs parenting can prove to be a challenge. For example, one early summer day my husband suggested we take the boys on a vacation to the beach. Inside I cringed. It sounded terrible. I envisioned chasing two little boys, ages two and four, both with speech and gross motor delays and sensory processing issues, around a beach. Oh yeah, and they both freak out if they get water in their faces.
Did my dear husband realize there’d be a lot of water to get in little faces at the beach and the pool?
I thought he was crazy, and I told him so. But with all the struggles of parenting two young children with special needs, I was experiencing anxiety, both my husband and I struggled with bouts of depression, and we were arguing quite a bit in our marriage.
After much discussion we decided a beach vacation could be a good thing for our whole family.
And, praise the Lord, it was a glorious vacation! The boys had a blast. Never had we seen such excitement on those little faces. “Where are we going?” my husband would ask the boys as we put on swimsuits and gathered our towels and sand toys. “Da beee!” my four-year-old son would exclaim, wiggling and doing his awkward yet charming interpretation of swimming strokes.
This child, who used to be terrified of water, was soon courageously jumping into the pool into his daddy’s arms. And my younger son added three words to his sparse vocabulary and learned to accept water splashed into his face without a meltdown, huge victories in our book. Huge.
My husband and I marveled at the excitement. We hadn’t experienced such joy in a long time. We knew this was a gift from God. An opportunity to enjoy our family, the progress our children were making with all the hard work and the never-ending therapies we were doing. A time to just rest and be a family.
Learning to Embrace Life in the Middle of the Mess
On the last day of our trip, the thought of packing up our belongings and heading back to our house, the never ending appointments, the constant need to advocate for my children and research how to help them, the alternating bouts of anxiety and depression, gave me a panic attack. Literally.
My chest felt tight and my heart pounded. Tears streamed down my face and I couldn’t catch my breath. My husband suggested I go out to the beach and spend some time by myself. Eager to process this overwhelming anxiety with God, I gladly went.
I listened to the waves crash on the shore, tasted my warm salty tears. What on earth do I even pray about? I expected silence from God–He’d been silent for the last year or so despite my desperate prayers and cries that had left my faith wavering. Was God really good? Was God even real?
Never have I been more thankful to be proven wrong. He whispered one word that broke the silence and banished the anxiety and grief that had gripped my heart for so long.
Embrace.
Embrace what? I wondered.
And for the next hour or so, God revealed area after area of my life that I needed to embrace. I wish I had written in at all down at the time, but I don’t think my pen would have flown across the pages fast enough. I was convicted. Encouraged. Loved by the God of the universe.
He would gently remind me of something I needed to embrace fully in my life. Something that I needed to not only accept, but cherish. My role as a mother. My husband and his personality. And my children. Their progress. Their personalities. This special-needs journey. Myself. And most importantly, God.
I don’t know how long I spent on the beach, tears rolling down my cheeks, anxious thoughts stilling, transformation unfolding in my heart. A couple hours at least. I probably could have spent longer, but it started to rain and I headed back toward our lovely beach condo where my family and a renewed purpose were waiting for me.
Deciding to Shift Your Focus and Seek Hope
For the first time in a long time I felt alive and happy and at peace.
All because I decided to shift my focus from my overwhelming circumstances to all the blessings and the good things in my life.
And you can do that too. Special needs parenting isn’t easy. It takes an intentional effort to focus on the good things:
- Celebrating your child’s progress (every single milestone and every hard-fought inch in-between), rather than focusing on their weaknesses.
- Reminding yourself of how much you have learned and grown and all the things you do as a special needs mother, rather than feeling like you’re not doing enough.
- Asking God what He wants to teach you from this special needs parenting journey, rather than asking Him why He has you on it.
- Counting your blessings and the good things in your life, rather than dwelling on the things that are hard and not what you expected for your life.
- Remembering that all of your favorite Bible heroes faced their own struggles and suffering and yet God used them and did mighty things through them. And He will do the same through you, if you are open to what He is doing and teaching you in your own journey.
Choosing to embrace this special life (and all the blessings within it) requires an intentional focus, but its impact will overflow into your heart, your faith, your life, your family, your purpose, and so much more.
Prayer: Heavenly Father, help me to let go of all the things in my life and in my heart that are not of you, and to embrace all the good things you have for me–hope, peace, joy, love, purpose and so much more. Help me to learn to embrace this life you have given me. Give me the strength and courage to continue to run this race with a perseverance that comes from you. Use my journey and my child’s journey for your glory, and may we be open to your plan, your will, and your future for us.
To view all of the topics in this series, check out our Stories of Hope page, and discover how others have chosen to live a life of hope, despite life’s greatest challenges!
Bio: Jenn Soehnlin is a mother to two little lads who are precious blessings and who both have special needs. She is the author of Embracing This Special Life: Learning to Flourish as a Mother of a Child with Special Needs.
Jenn enjoys blogging about faith, praying scripture, and special needs parenting at www.embracing.life. You can also find her on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.
Time to link arms and #linkup! Join us for our #StoriesofHope series and grab a dose of encouragement as you link up your inspiring posts! Share on X
Let’s Link Arms by Linking Up!
- Linkup 1-2 inspiring, family-friendly, posts using the Inlinkz tool below.
- Visit the link directly in front of you, leave a comment and share/pin their post.
- PRAY for the person directly in front of you!!
Thank you for sharing. I love what you had to say but most of all I enjoyed seeing your great big smile at the end of the post. Having children with special needs is difficult, but the blessings are immense. I loved reading your post. Hang in there, momma. You got this!
Thank you Maree!
this is the best spell caster i know He cast spells for different purposes like(1) If you want your ex back.
(2) if you always have bad dream
(3) You want to be promoted in your office.
(4) You want women/men to run after you.
(5) If you want a child.
(6) You want to be rich.
(7) You want to tie your husband/wife to be yours forever.
(8) If you need financial assistance.
(9) HIV/AIDS CURE
(10) is the only answer to that your problem of winning the lottery
Contact him today on oseremenspelltemple@gmail.com
I just want the whole world to know about this spell caster I met two weeks ago,I cannot say everything he has done for me and my family I was going through online when I meant this wonderful man’s testimony online how he won a lottery through the help of dr Ose I decided to just give it a try and my life is back to me now after i lost my job due to covid he gave me a winning numbers to play lottery and i won 5000usd for my first play since then i have been working with him and he has been giving me numbers to play my lottery i can not write everything he has done for me if you need a lottery spell today contact him on oseremenspelltemple@gmail.com www.facebook.com/Dr-odion-spell-temple-110513923938220
whatsapp +2348136482342
I think it’s so wonderful that you have been given the blessing to be an encouragement to parents of special needs children. Also, that you do it for the Lord is even more beautiful. I know how important it is to celebrate each milestone. I have a son with mild aspergers syndrome that is graduating high school this year. He is my fourth child to graduate. It’s not that he is more important but he had to fight a little harder to reach this grand mile stone!! I’m pretty sure I’ll cry a little more at this one. God sure has taught all of us things through his story, it’s been an amazing journey.
Thank you April! God has a plan and a purpose for everyone, and I’m embracing that mine includes encouraging other special needs parents who need a little hope and encouragement. Congratulations on your son graduating this year!!! That is an incredible milestone that deserves a big celebration!!
Life as a special needs mom is such a calling. I believe God must trust us so much becuase there are days… whew, well lets just leave that there. Change is hard for them but hard for mom. Thanks for the encouragement and the godly perspective about the anxiety that accompanies this life.
Yes, I sure have grown a lot and had to rely on God like never before as a special needs parent. I wouldn’t change it for the world though–I love my boys to pieces and appreciate how God has grown me and is using me in this special needs parenting journey. Here’s to embracing this special life together, Tiffany!
SUCH a great point that it had to be a decision to shift your focus. I think it’s easy to pray and ask God to do the work for us. But if we aren’t willing to change our mindset, then nothing will change. Thanks for this encouragement today!
You’re right, it’s easy to ask for God to change our situations or do all the work for us, but all He wants is our hearts and minds focused on Him. It takes an intentional effort to change your perspective and mindset, and it isn’t always natural to us, but is so worth it when we’re able to. I think of Paul and Silas, praising God in prison and I think to myself if they can do that I can too. Or I’ll at least try. 😉
Jenn, thank you for sharing your beautiful story! The beach vacation was just what you needed to shift your focus, as you wrote. It’s amazing how we can get stuck in a rut. Sometimes God gives us a gentle nudge to get us out of our own way. Loved reading this post!
Yes, it seems God has a way of getting our attention when we’re out in His beautiful creation or out of our routines and ruts (as you put it). Thank you Laurie for your sweet words! 🙂
Beautiful – and spot on. From one special needs mom to another. Sharing this on social media today. laurensparks.net
Aww, thank you for your encouragement and for sharing Lauren, it means a lot. Here’s to embracing this special life together!
I LOVE, love, love the encouragement found through your experience, wisdom and the subtle (not-so-subtle) shift you made in embracing this special life the Lord has called you to! Thank you for sharing your heart with us today! I know so many who can relate, and will be blessed by your words. <3
Thank you Rachel for letting me share my story! And for your sweet words of encouragement. I pray all of the stories of hope in this series truly do bring hope and encouragement to everyone who needs some in their life, no matter their life situations. <3
I have worked with children a lot, doing family daycare was demanding at times but my mother and I and a helper had up to fifteen children, there was a little discipline, time outs, a few tantrums. Fast for forward a few years and helping with foster children has been difficult, one can be like the whole fifteen, they are labeled with so many things and some are not necessarily special needs but just growing and developing at different paces. I believe He meant for them to be a joy, aren’t we all special to Him and He knows our needs. So glad you got to rest, he has your tears. Praying for your family.
Hi, did you know there are spells to win love back from an ex. I have done it. I love reading about relationships and how to make them work, how to better the relationship, and how to keep the spark alive, even how to talk to them a certain way to get them to think a different way about the situation and you. If you need advice or want to win your ex back, try DR EMU copy and message on the following ( Email: emutemple@gmail.com ) or ( WhatsApp: +2347012841542 ) It will change your mentality and get you what you want.
this is the best spell caster i know He cast spells for different purposes like
(1) If you want your ex back.
(2) if you always have bad dream
(3) You want to be promoted in your office.
(4) You want women/men to run after you.
(5) If you want a child.
(6) You want to be rich.
(7) You want to tie your husband/wife to be yours forever.
(8) If you need financial assistance.
(9) HIV/AIDS CURE
(10) is the only answer to that your problem of winning the lottery
Contact him today on oseremenspelltemple@gmail.com