Welcome to the Overcoming Insecurity series! This is a 4 part, weekly series and collaboration of 4 inspiring women, joining together to encourage those of us who wrestle with insecurity.
That’s all of us, right?!
Please join us each Wednesday for our new series!
When Insecurity Says You’re Not Good Enough
Be Thee Inspired | Milk & Honey Faith | Blue Jean Gypsy | Beauty in My Brokenness
There was once an insecurity within me that took years for me to overcome.
Growing up I had a deep fear that I would not be able to go to Heaven and it stemmed from an experience I had with a family member as a small child.
Unfortunately, when a mature adult tells you something during your formative years it sticks with you and it’s absorbed as truth. Even if it’s a lie. That is precisely what happened to me.
The Lie I Believed
Although I was not raised in a Church, I had family members who were devout members of a certain congregation that shall remain nameless.
This church was not only attended by family members for years, but it happened to be around the corner from the home I was brought up in. That meant that local neighbors (including my best friend’s family) were also church members.
One particular afternoon, I recall sitting with one such family member and talking about God. I believe I was about seven or eight years old at the time. As we talked about God I remember speaking about Heaven and the excitement I had about one day walking through the pearly gates and how beautiful it would be.
“I can’t wait to go to Heaven!”, I exclaimed.
I can vividly remember this family member, a blood relative, looking down at me and telling me nonchalantly that I would not be making it to Heaven. I was told that I couldn’t go.
I remember being absolutely shocked. So much so, that I broke into tears.
As I sobbed and I can remember that I pleaded for forgiveness for whatever it was that had sealed my fate. When I asked why, the reason given was simply that my parents had not baptized me as an infant, therefore my time had passed, and it was too late for me.
That’s all it took. One lie, and I accepted it hook, line, and sinker.
I would never be good enough to be able to get into Heaven because of a choice my parents had made.
I Tried to Save Myself
Since my family members and friends still attended this church, occasionally I would go with them. I thought that maybe if I showed up God would take notice. That He would see my effort and count me worthy.
I will never forget how insecure I felt in those moments. I felt like a counterfeit. I didn’t know the songs, I didn’t know the prayers, and I couldn’t go up front for the special sacrament that took place.
I became completely self-conscious as if a giant red arrow was hovering me that was singling me out as a future resident of hell. I distinctly remember feeling like an outcast when all I wanted was to be accepted.
As I got older, that dark feeling sunk deep inside of me marking me as unworthy. My confidence in God was completely depleted and I believed that He did not love me.
Yet, deep down inside me there was something telling me not to give up on seeking Him. Even though I felt left out, rejected, and discouraged, there was a glimmer of hope that one day, there would be a way for me to find Jesus and make my way to Heaven.
That one day came when I was fifteen years old. That is when I came to know Jesus as my Lord and Savior and everything that I had been told was revealed as a lie. I actually would be making it to Heaven, but not by anything I had done, only by what Jesus Christ Himself did upon the cross.
Even as much as I heard that message it still took years before I really let that truth sink in. He had done it all.
“God saved you by His grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it.”
Ephesians 2:8-9 NLT
I Still Didn’t Feel Good Enough
Once my salvation was sealed, the insecurity of not being saved turned into an insecurity of not being good enough.
I now felt like I wasn’t holy enough or righteous enough. My insecurities rose once again because of my tendency to look at what was going on around me, instead of the transformation going on within me. Now I was comparing myself to church going girls who seemed like they had never done a bad thing in their life.
It was an endless draining cycle that had no end in sight. I was afraid to be me because I simply felt that I wasn’t good enough.
That is how deceitful the devil is. He tortures us with feelings of inferiority and insecurity. He strips us of our confidence and hope and replaces those feelings with doubt and discouragement.
Here is what I have learned over the years as a believer in Christ…we all start somewhere and there is a past that we need to let go of. There were lies sown into us that we allow to take root. They need to be severed.
We can start anew because we are new creations in Christ.
“This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!”
2 Corinthians 5:17 NLT
When we can grasp that concept we will be secure in knowing that we are accepted and loved by a gracious God. He is a God who created us and knows all about our flaws. After all, He is the one who put them there. Our imperfections are not there for us to dwell on but instead are instruments that will help us grow.
Here is an important truth to ponder…If we were all born perfect and without mistakes then there would be no need for God’s grace in the first place.
When we our secure with our identity in Christ we will begin to flourish and mature in the faith.
“Because of Christ and our faith in him, we can now come boldly and confidently into God’s presence.”
Ephesians 3:12 NLT
What Insecurity Has Taught Me
I am not angry at my family member who told me what they did because I now know that is a lie they bought into. It was a lie that they believed as a truth. I love this family member dearly and continually pray for their salvation. It’s important that you know that I don’t hold this against them.
This situation from my past has taught me that God is so much bigger than the box we put Him in. His grace is magnified within us because of our weaknesses. Had it not been for this family member telling me that I couldn’t go to Heaven, I may not of sought God’s truth out for myself. So in a way, I’m grateful.
I have since been baptized in water, but it was a decision I made on my own and it held deep significance.
I have come to realize that I will never be good enough when it comes to my own efforts. It’s Christ who views me as perfectly made for His own purposes.
There may have been lies that you believed just like I did, but you are not bound to believing them. Embrace the identity that Christ has given you instead that gives us full confidence to be who He created us to be. Perfectly imperfect and bound for Heaven.
“Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into this place of undeserved privilege where we now stand, and we confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God’s glory.”
Romans 5:2 NLT
~ Natalie Venegas
What about you? Do you see yourself in any part of this message? If so, I have an awesome Resource Bundle for you!!
Whether you are someone who struggles with insecurity on a regular basis, or just every so often, this package will help to set your mind on the things of Christ.
It is fully designed to remind you on a daily basis, of just who HE SAYS you are!!
This bundle is my FREE gift to you, so grab it today, by clicking on the graphic!
Meet Natalie Venegas!
**A note to my linkup friends: We will be taking a short break through the month of June, from our regular Spotlight Feature, in order that I can spotlight the three lovely ladies who have collaborated with me on our Overcoming Insecurity series. We will resume our regular Building CommunitySpotlight again, in July.
In the meantime, I’m glad you’re here! Please continue to linkup your inspiring posts below, as I still intend to visit each one, and share them with my tribe!**
Let's link arms by linking up! Join us at #destinationInspiration where we are sharing our inspiring messages among a community of believers! #linkup Share on X
Oh wow, I can only imagine the pain of hearing such unintentionally hurtful words at such a young age! It’s amazing to see how the devil uses people we love to penetrate our hearts the most. So glad to hear the redemption side of the story and how you now pray for her salvation, Natalie. That’s definitely a turnaround that has God’s name written all over it! Thanks for sharing your story!
It IS interesting isn’t it Sarah.?! It has taught me to be so much more careful about what I say to little ones because our words matter. Even the flippant ones. Thank you so much for taking the time to bless me with your words. It means so much to me.
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Thank you for sharing your story. I know it will help so many who have been told this lie too. I’m so glad that His grace is sufficient for me. (2 Corinthians 12:9) God bless!
Praise the Lord for He is so good to us. What was meant to harm us He used for good!
What a great example of how a lie can lead to so much trouble! Beautiful story of redemption Natalie so thank you for sharing it with us. Shows us how important our words are at any age.
Amen to that Gretchen! Words actually do hurt and unfortunately leave lasting marks on us. Thank the Holy Spirit that He is able to expose lies and help us to discern truth from error. Thank you for taking the time to comment today.
what a beautiful story you wrote down here. Your story reminds me of something I was not good enough for my family and my sons. However, everyone is not perfect. We have to forgive each other, as well as God, forgives us; building the trust in the circle of the family is very challenging. So thank you for sharing the story 🙂
Thank you Joyce! You are absolutely right. Forgiveness and mercy are offered to us as sinners so it’s imperative to forgive those who sin against us. Family relationships tend to hurt the worst but they are also the most rewarding. God bless you!
Beautifully said Natalie! What a perfect example of Gods grace!
Thank you Carmen! Only by His Grace is it possible to take hurtful moments and turn them into learning experiences. Glory be to God!
Natalie, I’m so thankful that you found your way to truth, and also that you have forgiven the carrier of the lie that hovered over your heart for so long. It’s so critical that good, solid teaching be made available to Christians, because error spreads like a disease!
That is so true Michele and I sometimes wonder about how different things may have turned out for me if I would have chosen to continue believing that lie. Perhaps religion would have plagued me or I could have spent my life trying to earn my way to Heaven. I thank the Lord for His saving grace!
So beautifully written! Thank you for sharing your heart! I think we all can relate in some form. Thank you for this beautiful reminder that not has Jesus done it all for us but that truth can overcome the lies! Blessings!
Thank you Elizabeth. I thank God for the discernment of the Holy Spirit and His life giving Word. I don’t know where I’d be without the saving grace of Jesus.
How sad that someone would actually say that! I’m so thankful for God’s grace and thankful that you chose to give Him your insecurities!
It is sad but it’s okay for God used it for good. The sting did not stick. I truly know that this family member meant no harm and sincerely thought they were sharing truth. What a good example to learn that the truth should always be shared in love, and only God’s truth.
I’m so sorry that happened to you, Natalie. So glad God showed you the truth. I once heard of nurse who was sobbing at a hospital while someone was being prayed for, when the minister asked why, she told him she could not be saved because she had cut her hair, he told her the truth. We need to talk to the right people, make sure we are better witnesses and teach children the love of Jesus because they so need it in today’s world.
It’s amazing how we are lied to by the enemy. He sneaks in and speaks to the darkest places in our hearts. We can overcome by asking questions and declaring truth. We have the victory!
Feeling worthy and accepted is a constant struggle of mine, but thanks to Jesus I don’t have to worry about it with God. laurensparks.net
I think that I will continue to battle these things too because the enemy knows my weakness. However our God gives us the most awesome weapons to combat these futile lies. We will get stronger and better equipped as time goes.
How devastating to have heard that lie from a young age. 🙁 I’m glad you found your way to freedom, Natalie! There is always hope.
Thank you Lisa! It was devastating but it set me out on the path to seek truth. Amazing how God uses the painful places to bring us closer to Him.
Praise God! Isn’t it amazing when we look back to His workings in our lives & how the enemy tried to snatch it away, what had already been written in the book of life…
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Jennifer
Thank you Jennifer! Coffee is my fave! I’m a chosen child of God and nothing will steal that truth. Thank you Jesus!
Amen Natalie – God is indeed so much bigger than the box we put Him in! Loved getting to know you through reading your post today. Thank you for sharing your journey. Rachel, thanks for the link up!
Thank you Debbie for your kind words. Be blessed!
Beautiful Testimony! I know God will use your story to help others. Thanks for sharing it with us.
That is my prayer Kelly! We refute the lies of the enemy in Jesus’ name! So happy to meet you.
This is beautiful Natalie. How wonderful that God continues to prod and probe even when we want to throw in the towel. I think of a meme I saw and shared that says “Me: throws in the towel. God: throws it back.” He continues to speak even when I’m doing listening.
I absolutely love Natalie’s words of encouragement to us, Rachel! I’m so grateful that you have highlighted her here at your space! And I didn’t know that you held a linkup! Giiirrll! I’m on it from now on! 😉 Thanks so much and I hope you and Natalie have a great week!
A very hurtful comment at the age of 11 still regurgitates and I know I have to consciously speak victory over it every single time. God doesn’t see us as a misfit, insecure woman but perfect and secure daughter .
I am truly blessed by this post
Beautiful post, Natalie – and there are so many who have been fed this same lie. I’m glad God spoke LIFE and truth into your heart! I especially loved the line, “There were lies sown into us that we allow to take root. They need to be severed.” What lies have been sown into my heart — and have I allowed them to take root? Hmmm That’s something I think I need to ask the Holy Spirit to search in me – so that any and all can be rooted out. Thank you for a great post! Have a beautiful week!
Thank you for sharing your story, Natalie. I love this – ‘I have come to realize that I will never be good enough when it comes to my own efforts. It’s Christ who views me as perfectly made for His own purposes.’ I am so grateful for a God who not only pursues us but rejoices over us as well. I need to remind myself of that truth often.
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